Butter and Shortening. Not The Same.

So, I learned some things yesterday.

(1) My parents have not done much baking since I moved out of their house.

(2) Shortening does, in fact, have an expiration date. Even if it’s not printed on the container.

(3) Rancid shortening is one of the most foul things on the planet.

(4) Butter is only a semi-acceptable substitute for shortening.

All that aside, it is possible to make choreg without using shortening. It just doesn’t have the same dough texture — the dough is sticky and less friendly to work with. Simple solution: instead of braiding the choreg, make little roll shapes.
So…if your shortening happens to have gone rancid, and you’ve already started mixing everything else (cough, cough…who checks their ingredients first?), you can switch out the 1/2 lb of shortening for 1/2 lb (2 sticks) of butter. To compensate, you’ll need to add some extra flour — I honestly can’t tell you how much because I was just adding a tbsp at a time until it worked, but it was enough to make the dough not stick to my hands. Best guess? Another cup of flour.

(5) My old camera is not nearly as good as the other one. Everything looks so blurry!

On the bright side: no matter how ugly and pointy the choreg might look before they go in the oven, they’ll smooth out and look better during the baking process. I was seriously concerned with the sticky factor, but it looks like it’s not that big of a deal after all.

Want that choreg recipe? It’s right here.

Okay, So It Takes More Than 5 Minutes

From start to finish, the artisan bread isn’t exactly the 5-minute deal that the book’s title implies, but I am so in love with how the bread tastes that I am completely unbothered by this. And, to be fair, the authors do clear up the whole 5-minute thing in the book — it’s 5 minutes of active work and a bit more time for rising, resting, baking, et cetera.

Time breakdown for my 5-minute-a-day bread:

Ingredients mixed together: 10:25pm
Dough rises in plastic container for 2+ hours: 1:26am
Dough is retrieved from fridge: 12:51pm
Ball of dough rests on pizza peel: 1:07pm
I remember to preheat oven: 1:47pm
Dough slashed and placed in oven (after extra rising time): 2:07pm
Bread retrieved from oven: 2:39pm
Delicious bread sliced and consumed: 3:26pm

Total time from start to finish: 17 hours 1 minute
Total time spent on bread today: 2 hours 35 minutes

I suspect that things will go much more smoothly (and faster!) next time I bake. I dragged things out by forgetting to preheat the oven. And sleeping.

The best thing since…well, you know.

Of note: I need a good bread knife. I used a steak knife to slice this because apparently I didn’t feel a need to own serrated blades before this.

My favorite thing about this bread is the moist, chewy interior. The so-called “custard crumb” effect that the authors described is surprisingly not difficult to achieve — I got it in my first try! The recipe is delightfully simple, and possibly fool-proof: I’m one to make every possible mistake (like not putting enough cornmeal on the pizza peel, or forgetting to preheat the oven), and my loaf turned out just fine, if a bit mis-shapen.

Choreg >>> Other Breads

Choregs are probably my favorite breakfast food of all time. They’re braided. They’re easy to eat on the go. They’re not obscenely sweet. They’re amazing with cheese. My grandma used to send freezer bags of these home with us, just so I could snack on them more than once or twice a year. Have I mentioned that my Gma is awesome?

This is her choreg recipe. It’s quite similar to Virginia Madoian’s recipe from The Art Of Armenian Cooking, although Gma goes a little bit heavier on the anise. Some Armenian women really like to make choreg in bulk, though, so I’ve halved her recipe. I lovelovelove choreg, but I cannot fathom why I would need a batch large enough to require five pounds of flour and ten eggs. This recipe makes more than enough dough…I needed two large bowls to let it rise. Incidentally, all of the choregs were gone in less than 4 days. Maybe I oughta make the bigger recipe next time?

The Recipe:
Choreg
8 1/2 cups flour
1 pint milk
1/2 lb shortening
1 stick butter
5 eggs, beaten
1 pkg dry yeast
1/4 cup water
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 tbsp salt
1/2 tbsp mahleb
at least 1 tsp crushed anise seed
at least 1 tsp crushed fennel
1 egg for brushing on top
sesame seeds
1 tsp liquid anise

Do This:
Preheat the oven to 375 just before baking.
Dissolve the packet of yeast in lukewarm water.
Melt the shortening and butter together. You can do this on the stove or in the microwave.
Heat the milk to lukewarm temperature.
Place the flour in a very large bowl, and use your fingers or a spoon to create a well in the middle. Fill this well with eggs, sugar, salt, baking powder, mahleb, anise, fennel, milk, shortening, and yeast. Did I mention that you need a very large bowl for this?
Knead the dough for about 10 minutes, or until it stops sticking to your hands. I promise that it will stop sticking to your hands at some point.
Cover the bowl with a towel, and let the dough rise for about 3 hours.
Punch the dough down, and divide it into 6 equally-sized balls. Cover again, and let rest for half an hour.
Roll each ball into a log, and cut into 6 pieces.
Shape into braids (I can draw a diagram if someone wants that — just leave a comment!) and place on a baking sheet. Let these sit for an hour.
Using a pastry brush (or your fingers), paint the tops of the choregs with egg, and sprinkle with seeds.
Bake at 375 degrees for 15-20 minutes, or until lightly browned.
Remove the choregs from the baking sheets, let cool for a few minutes. Serve warm with Armenian string cheese.

I could eat these every single morning.

Braiding the dough can be a little bit annoying, but if it gets sticky and unwieldy, pop it in the fridge for a few minutes. I promise that it’s totally worth it to make the braids. When the choregs are baked and you can pull off neat little bite-sized pieces, you’ll be happy that you bothered to braid them.

Special note for Chicagoans: I picked up the mahlab and sesame seeds (and some other cool things) at Middle East Bakery & Grocery. It’s an amazing little store right near the corner of Foster & Clark, and I am totally in love with it. Go. Now.